Life and how i feel about it.........

For the most part i am a happy person that gets along with most everybody i encounter but recently it seems like it just keeps getting harder and harder to remain that way. I usually look at all the good things in my life and i still have quite a few good things like my family and my loving girlfriend. But it just seems harder and harder to remember all the good things and try and get over the bad if i have a positive attitude and everything keeps going wrong. it just seems like its a futile effort. Now i know that for the most part i am in control of my situation, and i know that i need a job and that this is one of the biggest problems in my life. But it seems like every time i try and do what i need to it fails and i can't like right now i am trying to find a job but then my car decided to break down and then everything that possibly could happen to make it take as long as possible to repair has happened and it just seems like it never ends. But, enough of me whining and complaining about my life as it is right now. I also am very grateful for what i do have. and I'm glad that i am starting to go to college i hope that will help me in the future to be more successful. And i am very grateful for my girlfriend who i have known for three years now i feel glad that i have been able to stay Friends with her for that long and i hope that we can remain together for the rest of our lives but who knows ? And i really am happy for my brother Ben and his wife they have two beautiful kids now and i just wish i lived closer so i could have a better relationship with them. And just recently i have been thinking about what i have done in the past and where it has gotten me and I'm not very proud at all. I have decided i need to ask forgiveness of those i care about that i have wronged and i have decided to try and think more about every decision i make if it will help me or not. and so hopefully i will end up with a better future. After thinking about all this it just helped e realize more that i want to have a good job and be able to have kids with the woman i love and support a family but i know that will not happen very soon. But i know how fast time goes and so I've decided to center everything in my life around completing those goals. I am going to finish my school that i am enrolled in and find a good job. And i want to start saving my money so i can get married and get started on my goals. And i feel like if i focus my energy on something as positive as these ambitions i am sure i will start to notice i will be happier and begin to enjoy life more. Now i know that i will still have many problems but i know i just need to keep a positive attitude and remember what it is that i really want with my life instead of what would make me happy at the moment . and I'm sure my life will start working a lot better than it has been.